Entry #4

Colony of ants

I am surrounded by people tormented by their past , or the things they’ve done and

there’s no way for them to see it.
 The world we live in has become so loud that we all became blind to the real world.
 There’s always some distraction , some noise surrounding us at all times, and I have the luxury of being able to slow down my life until I can hear the birds sing.
 I can smell the rain coming down before it’s there , i can hear the leaf falling out of the tree before it reaches the ground but it came at a cost that no one could have predicted.

It’s as if, slowly, we’ve been selling our attention to the highest bidder and the illusion became better than what we could have ever imagined.

We’ve played with fire and now we’re all slowly burning. 
I see people inside their own little world but i don’t see them here anymore they’re gone , answering yes and no question but there’s no one home anymore.

everyone is now becoming a very disturbing product of society.

We’re not so different from a colony of ants.
 We lost the war for our attention.
 We fear robots and AI, but what if we’re actually becoming these things?


We don’t know who we are anymore, we don’t know where we are anymore and when you don’t know these things , there’s no hope left for you.

So aren’t we just living the same life , mindlessly consuming, struggling, fighting, and sleeping forever?

What’s the point of it all , we really only have one life and that’s it.

This fight for our mind has been lost a long time ago and no one saw it coming. 
But then what do we do with the people left that choose to stay awake ?


It’s like living in a nightmare where everyone is deaf and blind but you’re not.

You look around and see that there’s no reason to fight.
 Maybe they should all go back to sleep wouldn’t it be easier like that ? 


Would it be wrong to let it all go?


To slowly give up all that you are so you can live in this fake world, just like in a modern jail but no one know it’s a jail so we say we’re all free.

See, there’s the day where you gaze too far into the abyss and there’s the day where it decides to gaze back at you.
 There’s something that will break inside of 
yourself, kinda like a broken pair of glasses.
 You can still see, but it will always be a shattered view.

Some will hide in the forest, some will suffer, some will become judges of others and 
many will choose to end it now.

I still do not have my answers to these questions, and I probably never will, but there is one thing I know: the only medicine that ever worked for me is art ,any kind, 
Painting, writing , singing , music.. 
These are not the answers we want, but
 they’ll make sure you get to live another day in the real world.

Now for most people those words will mean nothing but i do not write nor sing for most people , i am not here to play in a circus nor try to be something I am not , I am sharing those things in the hope that it’s going to help the one awake out of a thousand sleeping.

Now, as I slow down my life until I can hear the birds singing, I will search endlessly for any answers for we all have a reason to be here and a mission to achieve and I hope that you find yours and that you dedicate your life to it. 


So bear with me , time is our savior and remember the changing seasons , nothing is ever forever.

C.J